Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Losing My Religion

Book prologue

When I was in college, some friends and I would meet on Tuesday evenings at a local watering hole called High on Rose, named for the fact that the bar was situated on the corner of High Street and Rose Street in the university district of Lexington, Kentucky. Almost weekly we gathered around one of the rustic wooden tables and listened to a live acoustic performance while snacking on chips, salsa, and beer.  
            It was there that I first heard a rendition of the classic John Prine folk song “Paradise,” with the famous line “Daddy, won’t you take me back to Muhlenberg County.”  My friends and I would sing the song over and over, week after week, and although it may seem cliché, the nostalgic lyrics stirred a longing in my soul.
Little did I know that one of the stops on my roller coaster journey would in fact be an old coal mining town situated in none other than Muhlenberg County, Kentucky, the very area that was the subject of this folksy tune. When I arrived alone in that isolated place a number of years later at the age of 27, I found that it was a far cry from the semi-metropolitan lifestyle I had once enjoyed. But this seemingly insignificant place in the middle of the rolling hills of Western Kentucky would prove to be a place of great transition in my life. Not only would I meet my husband there, but more importantly, I would encounter my Creator.
The first two lines of the song’s chorus are as follows:

Daddy won’t you take me back to Muhlenberg County
Down by the Green River where Paradise lay?

            In the song, Paradise refers to the small town that was the center of excavation by the prosperous Peabody Coal Company in the middle of the twentieth century. But I have to ask myself if I was, in reality, making a prophetic cry to my real Father in heaven as I raised my voice to sing the lyrics of this classic song. Is it possible that I was crying to Him to take me to a place where I would find my own paradise, which was nothing less than the peace and rest I had been seeking all of my life—the peace and rest that I eventually found in a man named Jesus?
Before I opened my heart to Christ, I allowed myself to be temporarily satisfied by counterfeit forms of freedom. I believed that a life without boundaries would satisfy my desire for a fulfilling existence. Many periods of severe darkness proved my theory was incorrect.
            I had a taste of true freedom in the cleansing I received from my Creator. When I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was forgiven of all my sin and shame and that my life was reconciled to God, my journey toward freedom began. And that is what this book is all about – a journey.
It is about what happens when we walk away from the good kind of religion (acknowledgement of the divine or sacred), and it is also about the liberation found in walking away from the bad kind of religion (the ritualistic act of trying to win God’s approval in our own strength).
It is about a journey toward everything the human heart longs for – peace, purpose, and freedom. Contained within my account are all the trappings of the typical rescue story…a girl carried away by addiction, depression, and aggression. And yet, my story is not typical at all. If it were, I would not have bothered to write it.

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Beyond Losing My Religion, Part 1

Some of the most interesting feedback  from readers of my first book came from friends who knew my experience and wanted to hear more. So I have begun to write more here. The message is simple. GOD IS REAL.

What we saw was beyond anything I ever could have imagined witnessing with my own eyes. Real-life horror unfolded before us during our trek down to the railroad tracks in Central City, Kentucky. A typical Saturday of sharing the good news of the gospel ended in an event I will never forget – one that left me with zero doubt about the existence of a supernatural realm that is beyond what we generally see with the naked eye. My husband Lee (who I was not yet married to at the time), and I, along with our friend Danny, approached a very unusual home that wintry, Saturday afternoon, wishing to tell someone about Jesus and to perhaps invite them to church. We were young, zealous evangelists, marching house to house every week, speaking to and praying for anyone who would give us the time of day.

The home we approached that unforgettable day was strange in many regards. The structure was small and was made entirely of concrete block walls. There was no siding on the starkly plain house which sat next to the railroad tracks at the end of a sleepy street. The only features that would indicate the building was a residence was the placement of the front door and the fact that there appeared to be a light on inside. Lee knocked on the door as Danny and I stood to the side. An older looking man of mid-sized stature answered the door and mumbled something that indicated he wanted to know the reason for our visit. He did not look at us directly.

One of us said something like, “We are out telling people about Jesus.”

He invited us in, and we naively accepted. As soon as we stepped inside, I noticed that all the furniture was turned backwards toward the walls, which were lacking any drywall, paint, or covering. Like the exterior, the inside walls were simply exposed concrete block. As I recall, there was a chair, a couch, and a small television, all facing the walls. The television, however, was turned in such a way that we could see that its small screen was not displaying a picture, but rather a snowy background like televisions not tuned in or hooked up to cable. I also noticed numerous cockroaches crawling on the walls and in the corners.

When we circled back around, the man was standing with his right hand on the door knob. He had closed the door, and there we stood facing him. Everything after that happened pretty quickly, and I don’t recall all that was said. Lee and I did most of the talking, restating our reason for being there. In the meantime, we got a solid glimpse of the man’s eyes. They had no pupils and no irises. Rather, they were a cloudy shade of blue. In other words, his entire eyeball on either side had the appearance of a blue sky marked with a hint of thin cloud coverage. A cataract can cause a person’s lens to become cloudy, but the cloudiness in his eyes was not limited to the lens; it covered the entire eye. I have researched hundreds of pictures of cloudy eyes, but have never seen anything like what we saw in this man’s eyes.

After Lee briefly explained our mission and our desire to tell people about Jesus, the man made one gruff statement that was clearer than all the others. He said, “I talk to Jesus every day.” Then he said this, “I am the prince of this area.”

We had enough spiritual discernment to know that there was something sinister in our midst. In fact, our friend Danny was particularly shaken by the incident. I began to pray, but I mostly stared at the man’s hand on the doorknob, hoping he would soon open the door and let us out.

Jesus refers to Satan in John 14:30 as “the prince of this world.” Likewise, the book of Daniel refers to demonic entities as princes. In the case of Daniel’s account, the writer is not referring to Satan himself, but to a demonic entity of lower rank, calling him the “prince of the kingdom of Persia.” (Daniel 10:13) We know from scripture that there is a hierarchy of demonic entities, which Ephesians 6:12 describes in this way: “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.” Was this man a physical representation of a “prince” of darkness? Or was he simply claiming to be one? Was he a demon-possessed person or simply a psychiatric case? Or was he something altogether different?

We eventually made clear our readiness to leave, and the man opened the door for us to exit. On our way out, he attempted to hand Lee a ragged one-dollar bill, which Lee declined, telling the man he could put it in the offering plate when he comes to church.

After leaving, we concluded that we were probably dealing with a demon-possessed person. We had experienced demon-possessed people in other settings, so we decided to fast and pray all week, determined to return and cast the demon out of him. By the next Saturday we were ready, although I recall approaching his home by the tracks with at least some reservation. On foot, we made our way down the street, approached the concrete block structure, and could not believe our eyes as we drew closer. We peered into the window that separated the exterior of the house from the room we had stood in just a week before. We did not see the backwards couch or chair, or the snowy television. We did not see the kitchen table and chairs which had also been part of the furnishings the previous Saturday. Nor did we see the unusual man. Instead, we stood looking at a room that was stacked from floor to ceiling with cardboard boxes. The boxes were covered in dust and cobwebs. Well-formed cobwebs cluttered the corners of the room where the walls met the ceiling. In other words, the concrete building had been serving as a storage facility for a long time – long enough to form layers of dust and cobwebs which would have taken months to materialize.

What is my point in sharing this story? First, there is a realm or dimension of existence that is beyond what we can see and feel, and yet it is just as real as the one we are most acquainted with on a daily basis. Secondly, our battles are not with each other, but with demonic powers which we cannot see. Thirdly, through Christ, we have authority over those powers. Jesus said it like this: “I have given you all authority to trample on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy. And nothing shall by any means harm you.” (Luke 10:19)

I don't know all the reasons we had the experience that we did, but I do know that when believers rise up with the prayer-filled desire to establish God’s kingdom, unusual manifestations will occasionally take place, sometimes of a demonic nature, but often as an angelic one (more on that at a later time). God opens our spiritual eyes and allows us to see things as they really are, especially when we are not asleep spiritually. He is constantly training and teaching, always preparing His followers for things to come. Ephesians 1:3 states that believers are "seated in heavenly places in Christ." Therefore, we do not need to fear anything that comes our way. This is one thing that must be settled in our hearts in the coming days. The light inside of me and the light inside others who have truly made Jesus the Lord and Savior of their lives is the very power that holds back the darkness in this world. And that light is Jesus.


Thursday, June 18, 2015

From Back Cover

As a child, Amy Mercer never dreamed of living a life riddled by addiction and utter despair.  She never imagined finding herself in defiant rebellion against God Himself. But by her teenage years, she was on a collision course tainted with destructive living – struggling with alcoholism, drug addiction, and extreme clinical depression – looking for answers in same-sex relationships and in the occult. By her early twenties, her journey had accelerated into a mad dash toward insanity followed by a close call with death.

What would it take to reconnect with the land of the living?

In today’s world, counterfeits to freedom are readily delivered in a variety of enticing packages, promising peace in the midst of pain—freedom in the midst of fear—meaning in the midst of cynicism.  But can the offerings of our current culture satisfy the longing of our hearts?

Losing My Religion is about what happens when we veer from the good kind of religion (acknowledgement of the divine or sacred); it is also about the liberation in walking away from the bad kind of religion (the ritualistic act of trying to win God’s approval in our own strength).

Losing my Religion is about finding out what really matters.


Book prologue

When I was in college, some friends and I would meet on Tuesday evenings at a local watering hole called High on Rose, named for the fact that the bar was situated on the corner of High Street and Rose Street in the university district of Lexington, Kentucky. Almost weekly we gathered around one of the rustic wooden tables and listened to a live acoustic performance while snacking on chips, salsa, and beer.  
            It was there that I first heard a rendition of the classic John Prine folk song “Paradise,” with the famous line “Daddy, won’t you take me back to Muhlenberg County.”  My friends and I would sing the song over and over, week after week, and although it may seem cliché, the nostalgic lyrics stirred a longing in my soul.
Little did I know that one of the stops on my roller coaster journey would in fact be an old coal mining town situated in none other than Muhlenberg County, Kentucky, the very area that was the subject of this folksy tune. When I arrived alone in that isolated place a number of years later at the age of 27, I found that it was a far cry from the semi-metropolitan lifestyle I had once enjoyed. But this seemingly insignificant place in the middle of the rolling hills of Western Kentucky would prove to be a place of great transition in my life. Not only would I meet my husband there, but more importantly, I would encounter my Creator.
The first two lines of the song’s chorus are as follows:

Daddy won’t you take me back to Muhlenberg County
Down by the Green River where Paradise lay?

            In the song, Paradise refers to the small town that was the center of excavation by the prosperous Peabody Coal Company in the middle of the twentieth century. But I have to ask myself if I was, in reality, making a prophetic cry to my real Father in heaven as I raised my voice to sing the lyrics of this classic song. Is it possible that I was crying to Him to take me to a place where I would find my own paradise, which was nothing less than the peace and rest I had been seeking all of my life—the peace and rest that I eventually found in a man named Jesus?
Before I opened my heart to Christ, I allowed myself to be temporarily satisfied by counterfeit forms of freedom. I believed that a life without boundaries would satisfy my desire for a fulfilling existence. Many periods of severe darkness proved my theory was incorrect.
            I had a taste of true freedom in the cleansing I received from my Creator. When I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was forgiven of all my sin and shame and that my life was reconciled to God, my journey toward freedom began. And that is what this book is all about – a journey.
It is about what happens when we walk away from the good kind of religion (acknowledgement of the divine or sacred), and it is also about the liberation found in walking away from the bad kind of religion (the ritualistic act of trying to win God’s approval in our own strength).
It is about a journey toward everything the human heart longs for – peace, purpose, and freedom. Contained within my account are all the trappings of the typical rescue story…a girl carried away by addiction, depression, and aggression. And yet, my story is not typical at all. If it were, I would not have bothered to write it.